IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people are afraid to go out for fear of being robbed on the streets. Still, there are robberies that happen I side houses. What do u think is the best things a person can do to ensure his/her own security? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

#people #fear #streets #robberies #side #houses #person #security #support
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
With each advancing day, new issues come to light. Today, most of the population is petrified of stepping outside of their houses in the fear of getting robbed, but in vain as the cases of breaking and entering are growing simultaneously. It is the need of an hour for people to take responsibilities of their own security. The very
first
 step to one's safety is to live in a safe environment and the colonies which are well lit and the trees and bushes nearby are trimmed.
Moreover
, the security alarm systems and CCTVs must be installed in every household as these alarm systems can make the house secure even when the owner is outside for longer hours.
Furthermore
, a pet dog can alert the owner when some unfamiliar person tries to break into the house.
Secondly
, education and training should be given especially to the vulnerable groups
such
 as females and children. Teaching defensive techniques through campaigns will give them confidence to fight when they face the robbers. In spite of that, females should avoid going outside late in the night, which will make them an easy target to burglars. The government and police can ensure security of its citizens by taking a few measures. The cops can increase the time of patrolling in an area where there is an increase in the burglary crimes. The government can install the cameras and proper lights in every street.
Moreover
, high penalties and punishments should be imposed to avoid thefts. To conclude, the government and the individuals should collectively take measures to avoid street and house robberies.
Submitted by Arash on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Security systems: A set of integrated devices and software designed to protect against intrusions.
  • 2. Surveillance: Continuous observation of a place or person to gather information, often for security purposes.
  • 3. Reinforce: To strengthen or support, especially with additional materials.
  • 4. Vigilant: Keeping careful watch for possible danger or difficulties.
  • 5. Deadbolt locks: A type of lock that is much stronger and provides greater security than a regular spring lock.
  • 6. Neighborhood watch: A community-based program where residents collaborate to monitor and report suspicious activities.
  • 7. Cautious behavior: Actions taken to avoid potential dangers or risks.
  • 8. Self-defense: The act of defending oneself from physical harm.
  • 9. Community initiatives: Efforts organized by a group of people living in the same area to improve their common welfare.
  • 10. Deterrence: The action of discouraging an action or event through instilling doubt or fear of the consequences.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: