IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

demand for food is increasing worldwide. what is the cause of this? what measure can the international community take to meet this demand?

#demand #food #measure #community
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Groceries market is growing rapidly, all over the world,
Use synonyms
people
Correct word choice
and people
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 require more and more. Many factors caused
this
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 issue and with no
doubts
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doubt
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 the proper measures need to be taken by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
To begin
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 with, the increasing
number of
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apply
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global population is one of the main reasons
of
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for
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demand
Correct article usage
the demand
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 for
food
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. It especially applies to undeveloped countries, where the amount of humans is rising the most.
This
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 enormous population needs a lot of feeding sources
thus
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 it has to look for
food
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 anywhere.
Moreover
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, the number of
people
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 who waste groceries
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 increased as well.
For instance
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, rich
people
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 or citizens of developing countries are throwing away nutrition without thinking of those who need it. Another cause of
food
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 demand is
a
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apply
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climate change.
Furthermore
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, using agricultural lands for other reasons than farming and
the
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apply
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global warming
damage
Correct subject-verb agreement
damages
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 the ecosystem and feeding sources.
However
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, authorities and the society can take steps to solve
this
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 problem.
Firstly
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, the government should motivate
people
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 to buy the proper amount of
food
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 to avoid wasting it.
For instance
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, in some
countries
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countries,
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 there are public refrigerators to put unnecessary products so other
people
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 may take it.
Secondly
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, it is significant to use the land for farming
not
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, not
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 other purposes like building new tourist resorts.
Thus
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, the authorities need to support and fund agriculture to encourage
people
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 to produce
food
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. In conclusion, various measures are needed to resolve the issue of
food
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 requirements in the world and
people
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 are responsible
to do
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for doing
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 it and
take
Wrong verb form
taking
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 care of their future
Submitted by karolapatela on

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task response
The essay addresses the main points of the topic but lacks depth and clarity in supporting the main ideas.
coherence and cohesion
The essay demonstrates a basic understanding of coherence and cohesion, however, there are areas where the logical structure could be improved for better flow and coherence.
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