IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

The use of social media, such as Facebook, Twitter are replacing face-to-face contact in this century. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages

#media #facebook #twitter #contact #century #trend
Today, there are many social media. The example of social media are Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Whatsapp. Social media is a great technology product which can be used to communicate with a person at different place. Every social media
has
Suggestion
have
 a unique
feature
. One of
feature
the time yet to come
future
 of social media is
video call
Suggestion
a video call
. We can
use
video
 call to communicate with person who stay far away from us.
Video call
Suggestion
The video call
Video calls
 can solve
problem
Suggestion
problems
the problem
a problem
 about distance. If we can solve the distance problem, we will reduce cost of transportation. It is a
biggest
Suggestion
big
 advantage of
use
Suggestion
using
 social media of
comunication
the activity of communicating; the activity of conveying information
communication
communications
.
Video
 call which as
feature
Suggestion
a feature
features
 of social media
is not only give
Suggestion
is not only given
is not only giving
has not only given
 us
advantage
Suggestion
an advantage
 but
also give
Suggestion
also gives
 us
disadvantage
. The
disadvantage
 of
video
 call is many people are busy on their phone without respect the people around them. The focus of social media user only on their phone so there is no interaction between people around them. Social media user can
use
 reminder application on their phone to remember their time of
use
Suggestion
using
 social media so they may take break to interact with people around the user. In 2019 there is a pandemic, which called covid19.
This
 pandemic makes many countries lock their transportation. Social media, which have
feature
Suggestion
featured
video
 call is very important. No one can move to another country to communicate face to face so there are many people
use
video
 call to contact their families, friends, and client. If we see the advantage and
disadvantage
 of social media, we can conclude social media give us bigger
advantageadvantage
Suggestion
advantage advantage
 than
disadvantage
.
Submitted by kriiiiiiss on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: