New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

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this

Linking Words

era of technology, new gadgets are released nearly every month, particularly online

gamin

the act of playing for stakes in the hope of winning (including the payment of a price for a chance to win a prize)

gaming

, where children play with each other on the internet.

This

Linking Words

has been a great achievement for

human-kind

all of the living human inhabitants of the earth

humankind

however

Linking Words

, I believe the advantages do not outweigh the disadvantages, as there are many worries in respect to the side effects of these devices.

Firstly

Linking Words

, children nowadays spend most of their free time on smart devices, from studying to playing, all is done

Suggestion

with

electronics.

For example

Linking Words

, on average a child spends 5 hours daily on gaming consoles

such

Linking Words

Playstation

Suggestion

the Playstation

. A study done by Australian University of Medical Sciences in 2019, reported that children with increase screen-time are more

likley

has a good chance of being the case or of coming about

likely

to have an early deterioration of eyesight.

Eventhough

Suggestion

Even though

, technology has made many things feasible, it has

also

Linking Words

raised concerns regarding the addictive

affect

a phenomenon that follows and is caused by some previous phenomenon

effect

, it has on a young mind.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, due to the rising spread of diseases

such

Linking Words

as Covid-19, parents prefer their child to play inside

instead

Linking Words

of being outside. For

this

Linking Words

reason, guardians are letting children play on online games,

however

Linking Words

, they should be worried about

detrimental effects

Suggestion

the detrimental effects

its having on a child's brain.

Moreover

Linking Words

, psychologists have reported, that children in the future

tend

Suggestion

will tend

loose

fail to keep or to maintain; cease to have, either physically or in an abstract sense

lose

ability

Suggestion

the ability

socilaise

take part in social activities; interact with others

socialise

socialize

in-person, and stay away from social gatherings. To conclude, though technology has made life easy and entertaining for kids, it has

also

Linking Words

introduced many negative effects, it is having on younger children.

mehulsharmaSun Aug 30 2020

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Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

239 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Digital literacy
Cyberbullying
Sedentary lifestyle
Inappropriate content
Self-learning
Screen time
Social inequality
Enhanced communication
Creative expression
Educational resources

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Your opinion

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why this is the case? What can be done about this p

Today news plays a crucial role in people's lives and more significantly influences people than before. Why is this case? It is a positive or negative development?

Some people think secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects. Other people say this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

These days many families move to other countries for work. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this move. However, others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.