IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many countries women are allowed to take maternity leave from their jobs during the first month after the birth of their baby. Do advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#countries #women #maternity #jobs #first #month #birth #baby
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Women who have the rights to get
maternity
 after the baby was born to give their one month leave is merits and demerit in the essay I will discuss them. Being temporarily off work means the new mothers can have time to recover from their delivery. Recent research suggests that longer
maternity
 leaves may benefit infant health and development - children whose mothers take longer leaves found to have lower mortality rates and higher test scores. Yet little is known about the effect of longer
maternity
 leaves on the physical and mental health of mothers.
Besides
,
maternity
 leave can
also
 make it possible that the father, mother, and the newly-born baby share good quality family time. The infant needs to love from their parents because there are too small,
on the other hand
, expert says children who eat mother's breast milk is more health than that feed milk power and grow faster. If women do not permit to leave not only their babies cannot be taken care of, but
also
 it leaves emotional isolation, thereby making the family less closely-knit. There are some problems for women to take
maternity
 leave may effect on company's loss productive, another problem college will replace your work, if he superior to you'll lose a job. In conclusion, ，
Although
 woman discrimination in their work felid, give birth to a baby is women rights, nobody stops them I believe that take leave is more advantages than disadvantages
Submitted by 1339232976 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: