Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television has destroyed communication among friends and family. Use specific reasons and examples to support your option.

#television #communication #friends #support #option

Nowadays, watching television is a common

activitiy

Correct your spelling

activity

at home. Some people think that it has an impact on our

communication

with friends and family. I

disgree

Correct your spelling

disagree

with

this

notion. In

this

essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument and give my own point of view. Many people share their

time

with family and friends and they always talk about

Add an article

the

show examples

rogramme which

is watch

Change the verb form

is watched

show examples

on television.

For example

, we watch

Add an article

the

show examples

ews on

and we

also

talk about something relating to the new with our family member.

This

not only can make a

communication

with them but

also

create a good

parent child

Add a hyphen

parent-child

show examples

realtionships

Correct your spelling

relationships

towards

Verify preposition usage

apply

show examples

the family.

Moreover

, we

also

talk about series which is

Add an article

the

show examples

show

Change the form of the verb

shown

show examples

. The evidence is a

show

plaform

Correct your spelling

platform

is called Netflix. It produces many famous series

story

Change to a plural noun

stories

show examples

, film and programme and it

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

a topic in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

society. We can talk about the plot with our friends that make our conversation become more interesting.

On the other hand

, there are some drawbacks. Some people are

programme addict. They just cannot stop to do with it. The best example is there

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

some news about teenagers who watch

and even forget sleep or to eat.

Therefore

, they have

this

activity

Verify preposition usage

show examples

their own self.

This

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

them distract from others and become less to talk with their family and friends.

In addition

, if they spend too much

time

to watch

alone.

This

also

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

them reduce sharing

time

with relatives.

This

is why some people think that would

destory

Correct your spelling

destroy

the

communication

with each other. In conclusion,

although

watching

have some drawbacks by people do not limit their

time

to watch

However

, I strongly believe that watching

Add an article

the

show examples

V show with our family and talk about

series'plots

Correct your spelling

series plots

can help us develop

Change the article

show examples

interesting

communication

with them.

Submitted by yeahkubi on Sat Sep 19 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

distraction
monopolize
meaningful conversations
engrossed
face-to-face interactions
weakened bonds
diminished quality
superficial content
sensational
negatively affecting
social development
family-oriented programs
bonding activities

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