Many people in the music business feel that illegal music sites on the internet are a serious threat to the industry and more should be done to prevent them from operating. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

In
this
concurrent world, it is undoubtedly true that piracy has become inevitable. It is widely believed that illegal sites pirating songs has
becoming
Change the verb form
to become
show examples
a major threat to the
music
industry and to prevent
such
damages, several measures have to be taken.
However
, I strongly disagree with
this
point of view, as I believe these sites help the listeners to access free
music
, while
also
providing fame for new composers.
Music
has become a part of everyone's life. Nowadays it costs a lot to genuinely purchase a record or a CD on the market.
Hence
, the demand for illegal sites has increased.
That is
, these sites illegally pirate a hit album or a song and release it through their website, and allows their users to listen
Add the preposition
to
show examples
songs.
This
benefits listeners as they can hear as many songs as they can without spending a dime. Examples of
such
music
sites are Youtube, Piratebay, Soundcloud. These sites allow their users to browse from thousands of
music
collections for free. These sites attract a large number of youth, which helps new composers to gain popularity among them. In reality
Add a comma
,
show examples
people show less interest in buying albums from fresh faces.
This
is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
music
companies do not spend money on advertisements to promote new talent.
Hence
, newcomers allow their songs to be on the illegal sites in a hope of receiving recognition from a million users.
For instance
, famous singer Ariana Grande has become popular by allowing her songs to be shared across pirated sites. Now she is one of the top singers in the world.
This
essay discussed the reasons on how illegal sites can help the
music
industry grow. In my opinion,
such
illegal sites act as a platform to showcase one's talent, and
also
creates an interest in listeners by providing free access. These actions are comparatively helpful for the
music
industry to grow huge.
Submitted by srinathreddy on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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