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Writing Samples
Band 4

In some time countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

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Usually finishing high school represent an important moment in our
life
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 because is the time when you decide
who
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whom
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 you wanna become, what path you want to take , where you wanna go, and most of that decisions are influenced by our beliefs, family and society´s norms.
That is
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 why in some countries, as the argument mention, young people are encouraged to
work
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 or
travel
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 for a
year
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 before they start their
university
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´s studies. I believe is important to understand all the
arists
Correct your spelling
artists
 of taking
this
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 advice.
First
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 of all, if someone
decide
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decides
show examples
 to take a
year
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gap
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 because he or she doesn´t know which career to choose. It will be a great decision to
travel
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, because you will have the opportunity to learn about different cultures, expanding your view of the world, and in that journey
Add a comma
,
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you could probably find yourself and your propose of living and choose a wise decision regarding their career. Another good point is that if you take a
year
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 to
work
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 because you do not have the money to
travel
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, it could be a great
opportunitie
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opportunity
 for saving money and start
university
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 with
less
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fewer
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 worries about your economic future,
also
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 you could probably treat yourself to a nice restaurant with tasty foods, new gadgets, etc.
On the other hand
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, if you take a
year
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 ,in a sense, you will "lose" time because people who decide to start
right
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 away will finish
university
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 earlier and place themselves in the
work
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 environment than a person who took a
year
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gap
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.
Also
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, start the
university
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right
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 after finishing high school could make the process of learning easier because you´ll adapt to the
rythm
Correct your spelling
rhythm
 of study faster than the others. Another point is that in an ideal situation if the person
manage
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manages
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 to catch a job
right
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 after finishing
university
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 and continue to
work
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 for 20 years more they will end working one
year
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 earlier than the other human who
decide
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decides
show examples
 to take a
year
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gap
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. To summarize, studying
right
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afert
Correct your spelling
after
 high school could have their great points like finishing
university
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 earlier and place yourself at
work
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 younger than the others.
However
Linking Words
Add a comma
,
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taking a
year
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gap
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 to
work
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 or
travel
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 could be a great idea to find your real propose in
life
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 if you do not what to do with your
life
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 or saving extra money to buy fancy stuff. I believe that in the end
Add a comma
,
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the
decission
Correct your spelling
decision
 of taking a
year
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gap
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 of not will depend
of
Change the preposition
on
show examples
 your needs , personally
Add a comma
,
show examples
I think that
travel
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 to find what you really want to do with your
life
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 is the best
decission
Correct your spelling
decision
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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