IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Reading fiction (such as novels and short stories) is more enjoyable than watching movies. Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position.

Undoubtedly, recently, the topic of whether reading fiction is more enjoyable
or
Correct word choice
than
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 watching
movies
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 has sparked a heated debate. In my opinion, both are totally different in nature and
hence
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, the advantages of both are totally different from each other.
Therefore
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, the comparison is impossible. On the one hand,
firstly
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, when fiction
books
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 are considered, first of all, they are portable in nature,
thus
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 they can be taken anywhere one goes.
That is
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 to say that
people
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 in the first world countries and
industrialized
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industrialised
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 nations read different kinds of
books
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Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as novels or
Fix the agreement mistake
fiction
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fictions
Punctuation problem
fictions,
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 to enjoy
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 when they are travelling by bus, taxi or metro. For a tangible example, scientists in 2008 in London and in a study
proved
Wrong verb form
proving
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 that 66% of
people
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 who have used the public transport system for travelling have read different
books
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 on their travel.
Secondly
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,
people
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 read the book to increase their knowledge and experience, which can decrease the consequences of unwanted events in
people
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's lives
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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this
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 event is extremely enjoyable for individuals.
On the other hand
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, watching
movies
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 has many benefits too. First of all, watching
movies
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 or TV can affect
behaviour
Correct article usage
the behaviour
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 and mood of
people
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,
thus
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 it can be regarded as a remarkably valuable entertainment. In the second step,
this
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 kind of recreation extremely eliminates stress and tension, but it is not accessible anywhere. To
summarize
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summarise
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, some
people
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 are of the opinion that watching
movies
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 is more enjoyable than reading
the
Correct article usage
apply
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novels,
while
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 others are opposed to
this
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 view. In my opinion, reading
this
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 kind of
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books
Fix the agreement mistake
book
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 unbelievably more enjoyable than watching
movies
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.

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structure
Plan your answer. Pick a side, then give two strong ideas and one clear example.
style
Use short lines. Put one idea in one sentence when you can.
coherence
Link ideas with simple words. Use first, next, also to keep flow.
content
Give clear, easy examples for each idea. Use simple facts or real life events.
content
You show both sides and give a view.
coherence
You use on the one hand and on the other hand to mark sides.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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