IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some businesses find that their new employees lack basic interpersonal skills such as cooperative skills. What are the causes? Suggest possible solutions. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience You should write at least 250 words.

#businesses #employees #lack #skills
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In
this
Linking Words
 contemporary
life
Add a comma
life,
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 youth is more attracted to entertainment and mobile games rather than reading a newspaper and watching the
news
Use synonyms
 on television.
According to
Linking Words
 my perspective, it depends upon
Correct article usage
the
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circumstances and
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 to which juveniles are exposed to. Nowadays, information technology has made inroads in all walks of life.
Near the
Change preposition
The
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 entire world has seen the rapid growth of cellphones, smart television, and computer users in many ways. These all devices
became
Wrong verb form
have become
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 vital parts of today's new normal because of the COVID-19 Pandemic,
children
Use synonyms
 are attending
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
school on different platforms like Zoom, Google
meets
Capitalize word
Meets
show examples
,
Microsoft
Correct word choice
and Microsoft
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teams
Capitalize word
Teams
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 for which they started using digital
instrument
Fix the agreement mistake
instruments
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 quite often than before.
However
Linking Words
, it makes
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
easy excess to these devices to the young generation.
For instance
Linking Words
,
parents
Use synonyms
 have to give laptops or computers to their
children
Use synonyms
for attending
Change preposition
to attend
show examples
 their schools, once they finish, they browse
youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
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, google
Correct your spelling
and Google
, and play online games on the device.
Another reason
Fix the agreement mistake
Other reasons
show examples
 for being attracted to social media websites are Facebook, Twitter, What's an
app
Capitalize word
App
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, Instagram,
Correct word choice
and Youtube
show examples
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
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 where they chat,
share
Correct word choice
and share
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 photos and videos with known and unknown people. Youngsters spend their quality
time
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
browsing and making videos to have likes and comments from others.
Additionally
Linking Words
, online video games eating their golden
time
Use synonyms
 of studies or procuring knowledge. Youth lost their interest in happenings in the world. To exemplify,youth would like to spend
time
Use synonyms
 on entertainment activities more than reading or watching the
news
Use synonyms
. Because of
this
Linking Words
 COVID-19 Pandemic, neither they are attending school nor participating in any physical activities which contribute to an increase in screen
time
Use synonyms
.
Parents
Use synonyms
 should control
this
Linking Words
 by using various facilities like parental control through the internet. Encourage
children
Use synonyms
 to read books and try to spend some
time
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a reading newspaper with them.
Parents
Use synonyms
 can select different topics from the
news
Use synonyms
 and could have debates and discussions with them. Currently, there are many applications which give the facility of e-newspaper,
youngsters
Correct word choice
and youngsters
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 could utilize
this
Linking Words
.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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 most of their
time
Use synonyms
 in activities where they enjoy most, so it is the primary responsibility of
parents
Use synonyms
 to encourage them to read e-newspaper or watch the
news
Use synonyms
 on television to stay updated about happenings around the world.
Submitted by saloni  on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • interpersonal skills
  • cooperative skills
  • face-to-face interaction
  • digital communication
  • non-verbal cues
  • active listening
  • education system
  • technical knowledge
  • soft skills
  • remote work
  • work environment
  • comprehensive training programs
  • workshops
  • teamwork
  • role-playing scenarios
  • open communication
  • collaborative efforts
  • educational institutions
  • curriculums
  • hybrid work models
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