IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You took an elderly member of your family, who was not able to walk properly, to a museum and he/she faced a few problems. Write a letter to the manager of the museum. In your letter, * say why you visited the museum * describe the problems you faced * suggest what can be done to avoid those problems

#member #museum #manager
Dear Sir, I have recently visited your museum with my aunt who is 80 years old. The main reason for our visit was to see the new artefacts which arrived
last
 Monday.
Moreover
, my aunt has
deep
Add an article
a deep
show examples
 interest in war painting and your museum is designed for
such
. While we enjoyed every
Correct your spelling
masterpiece
show examples
master piece
Correct your spelling
masterpiece
show examples
, my aunt had difficulties moving between different floors. The reason for
such
 is, the elevator was out of function and there wasn’t any other way.
Such
 that, she had to use stairs all the time. We all know that at the age of 80 it is not an easy task. To resolve, it is essential to at least provide
wheelchair
Correct article usage
a wheelchair
show examples
 and make
ramp
Add an article
a ramp
show examples
 for it. So,
disabled
Correct article usage
the disabled
show examples
 or elderly can easily move between different floors.
Also
, it is best for everyone’s interest, if you can speed up elevator repair work. Thank you in advance, Yours faithfully, Jessica Pearson
Submitted by Nirbhay on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!