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Band 7.5

How harmful impact of violence in computer games , tv, movies and other activities on children . How harmful is the violence for the children. How do you solve the problem

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Nowadays, Crime deception in movies, games and other formats has significantly increased. All the popular computer games are filled with heinous criminal activities.
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 essay will discuss its adverse effect on young minds and correspondingly discuss measures to overcome
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 problem.
To begin
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

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It appears that an article is missing before the word entertainment. Consider adding the article.

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ntertainment format filled with explicit criminal activities has a huge impact on an adolescent's mind. It had made children immune to the pain,these acts cause to the victim.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, A kid watching a news piece on a person killing hundreds of people and seeing their victims on their TV screens, solidify the young minds and heart from the tragedy. They do not feel emotions towards the victims as it has become very common for them to see on their Tv screens.
Similarly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, children adapt and enact what they see in their surrounding or on a media. Media plays a vital role in corrupting the minds of children. They glorify the criminal acts like a Hero killing hundreds of people without fearing the law.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 leads teenagers thinking they can
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 get away depicting similar acts without any jurisdiction holding them accountable for their actions. To effectively prevent kids from being a trouble-makers in school or in society. It's their parent's responsibility to observe their offsprings online footprint. They should surveillance what type of content they are consuming.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,parents see their kids watching too many crime movies, they should intervene in their viewing and discuss their view on these content.
Also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, parents should have open conservation with children regarding how to behave in public. Children learn manner from their parents, so it is important for parents to observe their child behaviour closely. To sum up, there is no denying that crime-related content has risen over the past decade. But the responsibility lies with parents to monitor their kid's activities, and limit their usage.

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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