Nowadays many young people are drawn towards dangerous sports. What makes them so attractive? What measures should be taken to regulate such sports and minimise the risks?

#people #sports #measures #minimise #risks

Today extreme sports are gaining momentum, and some people have no idea what problem can cause

such

sports. There are many approaches to minimise negative consequences. Having a lot of adrenaline, youngers prefer

this

kind of sport more and more.

This

is the main reason for the attractiveness of extreme sports. To tackle

this

problem, the government should raise the price of membership,

as a result

Add a comma

show examples

most people will not be able to pay for them.

However

, bills can not be an obstacle for some people. To reduce harm to health, some several steps can be taken. One effective way to deal with

this

is having the doctor’s permission to participate,

accordingly

Add a comma

show examples

people can be sure that their body will not be shocked. The problem can

also

be addressed by TV channels, bloggers, being informers about the peril of dangerous sports.

Submitted by assiyaz on Sat Oct 17 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

141 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Extreme sports
Adrenaline rush
Thrill-seeking
Emotional experience
Peer pressure
Social influence
Community
Glamorous
Idolize
Safety protocols
Regulations
Certification
Equipment checks
Professionals and experts
Supervision
Guidance
Prevent accidents
Informed consent
Age restrictions

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Nowadays many young people are drawn towards dangerous sports. What makes them so attractive? What measures should be taken to regulate such sports and minimise the risks?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that robots are very important for humans’ future development. Others, however, think that robots are dangerous inventions that could have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons for stress at the workplace? What can employers do to make their employees’ lives easier?