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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The diagrams below show some principles of house design for cool and for warm climates.

The diagrams below show some principles of house design for cool and for warm climates.
#diagrams #show #principles #house #design #climates
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Information
technology
Use synonyms
 has become an integral part of human life, and we are becoming increasingly dependent on it. But
while
Linking Words
 it enhances certain aspects of our lives, I
also
Linking Words
 think it may be having a detrimental effect on others. One of the biggest drawbacks of information
technology
Use synonyms
 is that it can be incredibly time-consuming.
People
Use synonyms
 who work in international business have to read hundreds of emails daily, and children can spend hours chatting online. Some
people
Use synonyms
 would argue that
this
Linking Words
 time could be better spent. A related criticism is that it leads to unhealthy lifestyles. Rather than going out and taking regular exercise,
for example
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
 spend a plethora of time sitting at their computers or with their smartphones. In the long term,
this
Linking Words
 lack of activity does not do our bodies any good. Despite these drawbacks, we cannot deny that
technology
Use synonyms
 has made aspects of life more pleasurable. We all have instant access to entertainment and social connections are just a click away. Like many
people
Use synonyms
, I use a networking site, which apparently has more than 800 million active users.
This
Linking Words
 type of statistic illustrates just how popular
this
Linking Words
 website is. There are
also
Linking Words
 huge benefits to using
technology
Use synonyms
 for study and work. The internet is an invaluable resource for students of all ages, provided
that is
Linking Words
 used sensibly.
Also
Linking Words
, some areas of work have moved forward in leaps and bounds
due to
Linking Words
 the huge amount of data that computers can store. In conclusion, there are some negative aspects of
technology
Use synonyms
. Having said that, it is the way we use it that causes these. If it is used sensibly and
people
Use synonyms
 take regular breaks from their computers there are only benefits that remain.
Submitted by elifayku4 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words technology, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 2 times.
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