In many countries children are engaged in different kinds of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it a valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What is your opinion?

Many regions of the world, especially large metropolises, have witnessed a problem regarding huge volumes of
traffic
. In order to curb
this
issue, some people have suggested that governments should require all people wishing to use their own vehicles during
rush
hour
to pay a
fee
, and I agree with
this
proposal. With the following essay, I will elaborate on the reasons supporting my point of view.
To begin
with, a
fee
upon private vehicle usage during the
rush
hour
will discourage people from driving or riding their own vehicles, easing
traffic
congestion. Should the
fee
imposed be higher than the ticket costs for public transportation, citizens of a city will find public
transport
to be the most ideal option for their daily commute, stemming from its low price. A shining example of a city that has successfully implemented
such
a scheme is the British capital of London, infamous for its high volume of
traffic
and air pollution. Since the introduction of a "congestion
fee
" during
rush
hour
timeframes, there has been a marked rise in the ridership of London's public
transport
systems.
As a result
, recent statistics have shown that the amount of fine particles and harmful air pollutants in London's atmosphere has plunged dramatically, creating a better living environment for all Londoners. On top of that, the additional money collected from
such
fees can help fund a variety of projects that can vastly improve the life quality of the inhabitants.
This
money can go towards making busy cities greener. Stockholm,
for instance
, has utilized the funds from a
rush
Add a hyphen
rush-hour

It appears that rush hour is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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hour
regulation to plan more flora throughout the city, markedly improving its air quality.
Furthermore
,
this
additional money can aid tremendously in improving pre-existing public
transport
facilities,
such
as refurbishing outdated train cars, replacing buses or building bike lanes. Yet, some detractors claim that
this
rush
hour
scheme will discriminate against financially disadvantaged people. To combat
this
problem, I would like to propose some solutions that are practical for all governments on all levels.
First
, poorer people can apply for
this
"
rush
hour
"
fee
reduced or waived.
Secondly
, governments can subsidise public
transport
prices for
rush
hours. To sum up, easing
traffic
congestion and supplemental funds are just two of the various positive results brought about by a
rush
hour
fee
. For these reasons, I agree with
a
Change the article
the

It appears that the article a may be incorrect in this context. Consider changing it.

show examples
proper implementation of a law regulating
such
rush
hour
fees.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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