The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#information #individuals #internet #companies #organizations #outweigh

Private data is collected by leading

internet

companies and organizations of

many

Correct your spelling

any

show examples

person’s. In my opinion,

Add an article

the

show examples

isadvantages far exceed than the advantages.

Besides

private data arrange

also

help to stop money laundering Admittedly , there some basic benefits. It is good to collect data which data analyze police point out the terrorist and their movement .

For example

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the

show examples

S military was able to find Osama bin

ladan

Correct your spelling

laden

Ladan

by big data analyze .

Nevertheless

,despite

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the

show examples

bove positive aspect , I believe that there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a buddle of drawbacks . Collecting data without permission is a cyber-crime. As usually most of the people share their personal information or private picture to

Add an article

the

show examples

elievable person or special someone which is not public whenever it is seen by

internet

authorities.

Such

as some

bolloywood

Correct your spelling

Bollywood

Hollywood

starts drug information leak up

what’sapp

Correct your spelling

for

internet

companies .Online shopping is ubiquitous nowadays.

Although

online payment is secure ,

internet

provider at look over

this

which is increased the chances of hacking .The most awful issue is some time

govt

takes personal information of

anti

Add a hyphen

anti-govt

show examples

govt

members by the help of them

therefore

govt

can stop the protest

although

govt

has no right to block

somone’s

Correct your spelling

someone's

opinion . In conclusion,both sides have some

well built

Add a hyphen

well-built

show examples

logics

thus

It is hard to point out ,from my view , the obstacles are more than the beneficial views.

Submitted by Arifur Rahman Barno on Fri Oct 23 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

224 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people feel that legal age at which people can marry should be at least 21. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is better to get advice from old people compared to young people. Do you agree or disagree with this stuation?

It is more important for a building to serve a purpose than to look beautiful. Architects shouldn’t worry about producing building as a work of art. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us t buy things. othere people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In recent years, there has been a significant advancement in AI and automation technologies. Some argue that these technologies will lead to widespread job displacement. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?