IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays more and more women choose to work full-time. Is it a positive or negative development?

Today the amount of women who choose
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
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time
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 jobs is increasing. While
this
Linking Words
 tendency has some drawbacks, I firmly believe that it is a positive trend in general. Women working full
time
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jobes
Correct your spelling
jobs
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 can be a negative trend for a reason that those women are growing apart from traditional family life. Traditionally, women are the ones who take care of their family members,
such
Linking Words
 as elderly people or children. They are the main caregivers for them but since women work from 9 to 5 it is impossible for them to carry out those responsibilities. As well as women are not able to engage in household activities since they don’t have enough
time
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 for performing those tasks. While, I admit that those who choose to work full
time
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 face some hardships
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,
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in the beginning,
Linking Words
this
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these
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 concerns can be resolved with
p
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a
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roperly planned schedule and with the help of other family members.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that women working fulltime
is
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are
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 mostly a positive
trendency
Correct your spelling
tendency
.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, by working full
time
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, women gain more financial independence since they earn enough money to not depend on their parents or husbands. Even though they don’t engage in family life or household tasks, they are enabled to hire babysitters and housekeepers which may help them to spend more quality
time
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 with their children on the weekends.
Furthermore
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, invading female workers into
l
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the
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abour market increases the economical state of the country since the amount of workers doubles. To conclude, despite women working fulltime may lead to some negative outcomes
such
Linking Words
 as growing apart from family obligations,
nevertheless
Linking Words
, it is possible for women to gain a work-life balance. I believe that it is mostly a positive movement for women to work full
time
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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