Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

A lot of nations are offering salaried jobs to
children
.
While
some people believe that
this
step is good for them, few are worried and think that it is not appropriate. I agree that working at a younger stage not only
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
children
to develop new professional skills but
also
makes them more clever and disciplined.
This
essay will outline the advantages
children
have if they start working at an early age.
Firstly
,
children
are not exposed to practical working conditions unless they complete their formal education.
However
, if they choose to work early they not only gain more experience than others of similar age but
also
have a higher chance of growth in the company.
For instance
, my manager is of my age, but he started working
from
Change preposition
at
show examples
eighteen and
due to
his company knowledge and professional achievements he was promoted to
managerial
Correct article usage
the managerial
show examples
level in a few years.
Therefore
, working early in life benefits
children
as most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
jobs
requires
Change the verb form
require
show examples
candidates to have strong work experience.
Secondly
,
children
are introduced to a structured working environment
that is
different from their casual life.
In other words
, they have to follow a set of procedures designed by the company that they cannot deny.
For example
, a youngster who is short-tempered and outspoken, after getting a job in
call
Correct article usage
a call
show examples
centre learns to keep calm and talk politely with the clients even in an aggressive situation.
Therefore
, working at an early stage
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
children
more decisive and conscious about their duties which helps them to change as a person. In conclusion, it is surely beneficial for
children
to take up jobs at a younger stage of life because they build good qualities
as well as
gather more
hand-on
Correct your spelling
hands-on
show examples
knowledge for future progress.
Submitted by rachanaahire07 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and that ideas are organized logically throughout the essay.
task achievement
While you have provided relevant examples, make sure to address both sides of the argument and develop a more balanced argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • bilingual
  • multilingual
  • fluency
  • communicate
  • cognitive skills
  • cultural awareness
  • opportunities
  • globalized world
  • job market
  • interact
  • linguistic abilities
  • cultural exchange
  • language proficiency
  • language barrier
  • foreign travel
  • personal growth
  • academic achievement
  • self-confidence
  • enhance
  • cross-cultural communication
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