IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Children from age 7-11 now spend more time watching television and/or playing vedio games than before. What are the effects of this on children, families and society? What are the possible solutions to this problems?

#children #age #time #television #vedio #games #effects #families #society
Nowadays, Kids from early adolescence age are devoting their majority of the time in playing
video
 games. In
this
 essay,we will discuss the effects and possible remedies of the issue. To commence with, the adverse effects of the obsession of
video
 games on children are lower social skills and depression as well in critical cases. Gaming genres like virtual reality and the
first
 person's perspective required continuous attention.
As a result
,excessive usage results in reduced attention span and short-tempered behaviour.
For instance
,according to a recently published report on psychotic cases, there is a surge in the number of cases in children predominantly under the age of ten years.
Moreover
,the worst implications of
such
 issues will be on family and society. Children with addiction to
video
 games and television tend to be more introvert and less connected with their loved ones. In-game purchases like weapons or other added utilities are
also
 being reasons for criminal activities in children. In
r
Add an article
a
show examples
ecent report published by a state police department highlighted the increase in
n
Change the article
a
the
show examples
umber of juvenile theft cases solely for the reason of purchasing in-game utilities.
Hence
, the impact of
such
 addictions will not be limited to a single person but to family and society
also
.
However
, early diagnosis of the problem can help in reversing of the symptoms. Indulging kids in physical activities in early-stage and providing social support will be helpful to tackle the cause. To illustrate, activities like friends gatherings or sleepovers, group activities and many more will act as a tool to diversify the kids' attention to varied activities and not only on a few things To conclude, In recent times adolescents are spending extra time on
video
 games and television as compared to past. Timely identification and dealing with the issue will be beneficial for child, family and society
Submitted by cjsvig on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: