there are many different types of music in the world today. why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

It is indeed true that there is
v
Add an article
a
the
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ariety of
music
around the globe.
Music
is an essential part of human cultures from cultures.
However
, International
music
replaced traditional
music
somehow but I believe that traditional
music
has its own importance so it should be more important.
Music
is a combination of vocal which helps to express our emotions. Everyone gets in touch with
music
since his childhood as a child they learn language through poems.
Therefore
, it is an easy way to learn
the
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apply
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things.
Moreover
,
music
act as a
stress buster
Add a hyphen
stress-buster
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in today's fast pace life, there are many compositions which
helps
Change the verb form
help
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individuals to get relaxation and assist than to get better sleep who are suffering from Insomnia.
Furthermore
, it makes a bond between people when they perform in a group, it
also
helps a person to express his feelings in a way that words alone cannot. In a nutshell
Add a comma
,
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it is hard to think
Verify preposition usage
of
about
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life without
music
. I opine that traditional
music
should be valued over International
music
that has become so popular nowadays. International
music
is just fun and composed to earn profit only since traditional
music
represents the cultures, customs and history of a nation. Event traditional
music
plays
v
Add an article
a
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ital role in every religion.
For instance
, In Sikhism
Add a comma
,
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there is a discipline to sing hymns every morning and evening in each temple as they believe "rags" (particular composition) is an easy way
c
Add a pronoun
that
show examples
onnects to Almighty. In conclusion, there will be
p
Add an article
the
a
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light of culture and tradition if pop
music
becomes so predominant all over the world.
At
Change the preposition
In
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the end, I will say that
music
is a necessary part of human existence.
Although
International
music
is heard by
m
Add an article
the
a
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ajority
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
traditional
music
should be given more priority as it holds
c
Add an article
the
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ulture and tradition of a community or nation.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emotional release
  • cultural significance
  • globalization
  • cultural exchange
  • technology
  • preservation
  • cultural heritage
  • social cohesion
  • expression
  • consumption
  • production
  • traditional music
  • international music
  • diversity
  • identity
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