Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy? (14GT-3; 18/01/21;V-6)
It is true that everyone wants to lead a happy happy and successful
life
. There are people
who say more money
is the
effective way to have a happy Correct article usage
an
life
. It an
undeniable fact that having more Add a missing verb
is an
money
will make people
happy also
other factors will give immense pleasure to people
. Having more money
will allow people
to enjoy all their wishes. For example
, few people
would like to take a long vacation to exotic places this
will not be possible if they do not have sufficient money
. Moreover
, people
who are earning more money
will buy the things as
Correct word choice
that
per
Change preposition
apply
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
desires
. Most importantly, many Correct subject-verb agreement
desire
people
have a lifetime wish to own a luxury car by having more money
people
can make all their dreams into reality. On the contrary
, money
is not the only source that makes people
happy there are other things like spending time
with family, helping others
also
give
immense joy to Wrong verb form
giving
people
. Although
, if, we have more Correct word choice
However
money
but we
are not spending quality Correct pronoun usage
apply
time
with a
family Correct article usage
apply
member's
Change noun form
member
then
what's the use of earning more money
.
Change the punctuation
?
For instance
, a survey by Amnesty International revealed that middle classes are leading happier life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
then
rich Replace the word
than
people
, this
is because middle-class people
are spending more time
with their children and family members. This
would not be possible for many busy business men
. Another reason that makes Correct your spelling
businessmen
people
happy is helping others
. A good example of this
is Mother Teresa until, their entire life
she leads a happy life
by helping others
. Furthermore
Add a comma
,
people
, who help their surroundings will haveAdd an article
a
life
. To summarise, while
people
may vary with their opinions but
other factors like helping Correct word choice
apply
others
and spending time
with family members also
make people
happy. Happiness is not only restricted to money
.Submitted by Saravanan RS on
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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