New technologies provided machines which replaced workers to do certain physical jobs and tasks. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#technologies #machines #workers #jobs #tasks

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In modern times, it is becoming increasingly common for

machines

to perform physical activities which used to be done by an individual.

While

there are positives and negatives about

technology

evolution. I completely agree that new innovations should be

executing

Wrong verb form

executed in

show examples

certain activities. It is a well-known fact that machinery is taking over manual jobs. Indeed,

technology

has been growing in the past years and companies

had

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

introduced automation to their production line. At the Tesla company,

for instance

, there are

not

Correct your spelling

show examples

individuals working in the production phase. It is all controlled by

robots

which are working twenty fours hours a day.

Such

activity,

create

Correct subject-verb agreement

creates

show examples

an index of unemployment for many families around the world.

In other words

machines

help businesses by working at a low cost and people are replaced by them. Despite these arguments, others, myself included

feeling

Wrong verb form

feel

show examples

that

robots

are the future of the world. Even though many employees lost their

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

because of new innovations,

robots

can create and produce better high-quality products than humans.

For example

Coca Cola

Add a hyphen

Coca-Cola

show examples

produces millions of items per minute which would not be impossible to do by hand. In terms of productivity,

robots

can work many hours a day without

break

Correct article usage

a break

show examples

and can deliver many items per second. Clearly,

technology

has been in our society to make it better and provide good conditions for many communities.

Conclusion

Change preposition

In conclusion

show examples

, communities are losing their jobs for new

machines

nowadays.

however

robots

can provide a better service than humans. In my view, people can learn how to operate

machines

and they always have work to do in the future and

technology

is the future for many nations.

Submitted by rafael_cnascimento on Thu Jan 21 2021

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Task Achievement

Your essay addresses the topic and presents relevant arguments, but there are some points that could be clarified and expanded upon. Make sure to fully address the advantages and disadvantages of machines replacing workers and provide a balanced analysis.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay has a basic logical structure, but there are some issues with coherence and cohesion. Work on organizing your ideas in a more coherent and connected way. Use transitional words and phrases to create smoother connections between sentences and paragraphs.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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New technologies provided machines which replaced workers to do certain physical jobs and tasks. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

In today’s world of advanced science and technology, we still greatly value our artists such as musicians, painters and writers. What can art tell us about life that science and technology cannot?

The development of toursim contributed to English becoming the most prominent language in the world. Some people think this will lead to English become the only language to be spoken globally. What are the advantages and disadvantages to having one language in the world?

Some people believe that tourism promotes the economy while other argue that tourism destroy the environment. Discuss both views and give your oppinion

The rise of remote work has allowed many employees to work from anywhere in the world. However, this trend also presents some challenges.

Nowadays, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their employees' lives easier?