IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some say that it would be better if the majority of employees worked from home instead of traveling to a work place every day. Do you think the advantages of working from home outweigh the disadvantages?

#say #majority #employees #home #work #place
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"Employees" are the key factor of success for any successfully functioning organisation and they
also
 play a vital role in the workplace development and multicultural place. I disagree with the above claim that as the disadvantage outweigh the advantage, and in the following essay shall submit my
supproting
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supporting
 claim in my point of view.
To begin
 with, the
technologly
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technology
 has advanced so much that any work we do is done by connecting to internet and staff would be able to log-in to their personal accounts and take remote desktop connection in order to
reslove
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resolve
 the issue, while they are sitting in the
home
 on standby. If the same
staff-member
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staff member
show examples
 is in
a
Change the article
an
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office
 and along with his
collegues
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colleagues
 he would be able to interact with them. whereas, if he is in
home
 their would be no
inteaction
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interaction
 between them and
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
would be
Add a hyphen
would-be
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 no productivity.
Secondly
, if
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 team-member is working from
home
 they would not be following the
office
 timing and would
also
relay
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rely
show examples
 on the
third
-party apps to
login
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log in
show examples
 to their accounts and so there is any monitoring in the server
this
 would
sem
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seem
show examples
 like they would be working
consistantkly
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consistently
constantly
 in the
office
 timings. To
eleborate
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elaborate
celebrate
furthurmore
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furthermore
, working from
home
 would result in serious health issue because they would be facing monitor for
e
Add an article
an
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xtended period of hours would result in eye-sight problems, and would
also
 result in obesity.
For example
Add a comma
,
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let's take
p
Add an article
the
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resent scenario COVID-19 which resulted in
g
Add an article
a
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lobal pandemic, and
every one
Replace the word
everyone
show examples
 now working from help, which resulted in unnecessary buying of
Replace the word
stationery
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stationary
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stationery
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 items and utility bills. In
contarst
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contrast
 , to make
w
Add an article
the
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orkplace more productive every one should be
woerking
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working
 in the same place, as
this
 would help them to grow skill and interact with their project leader. In a nutshell, based on the claims that have been discussed . I disagree that
m
Add an article
the
a
show examples
ajority employee should go to
o
Add an article
the
show examples
ffice rather working from
home
,
hence
 there are more disadvantage rather than advantages.
Submitted by sairam5191 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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