Social media is becoming increasingly popular among st all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#media #st #age #groups #information #websites #risks

In the era of globalization, the invention of the internet has revolutionized human interaction by introducing various social websites which are increasingly popular among all ages. In my opinion, there are positive and negative factors in using social websites which will be discussed in the essays. The positive sides, the main advantages of using social

media

is convenient communication between individuals.

In other words

, the world is becoming smaller as people residing in different continents can interact and see others by overcoming great distances through the various social

media

applications available on the Internet.

For example

, during four years stay in Bandung located in West Java, I managed to interact with my family in Jakarta almost daily by using Facebook. It is obvious that social networking on the web is bringing people closer and distances would not matter in today's modern world. The negative sides, the main disadvantages of using social

media

is personal security.

In other words

, information personal about a person's location, family details, his interests can be extracted by manipulating social

media

accounts.

For example

, internet banking frauds are on the rise due to manipulation of the personal data available on social

media

However

this

threat can be overcome by restricting limited personal data sharing on social networks, which can enable us to make use of

this

facility without any imperil to our privacy and confidentiality. In conclusion, I consider that the chief advantage of social

media

by ensuring convenient and easily accessible communication far outweigh the easily manageable few drawbacks.

Submitted by lotuslunaris on Sun Jan 31 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that in order to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately owned vehicles should be banned in city centers, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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