Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time discus both these views, and give your opinion

#people #education #classes #part #child #focus #academics #school #time #discus

Physical education courses are believed by a growing number of people to be a crucial part of every child’s education.Others,

however

,think that focusing on academic

subjects

is more important. In my opinion,these two

subjects

should be considered and keeping a balance between them is the key to

children’s

success. On the one hand,courses which contain physical activities are necessary to be incorporated into

children’s

school

currIculum

Correct your spelling

curriculum

show examples

Such

classes are not only beneficial for

children’s

mental health but

also

effective for improving their physical well-being.

In other words

, having physical

educations

Fix the agreement mistake

education

show examples

school

children’s

daily schedule can help their body to release useful hormones which

lead

Correct subject-verb agreement

leads

show examples

them to avoid obesity.

In addition

such

hormones can help children to keep their feelings balanced which lead their mind to function properly.

On the other hand

, the necessity of academic

coursers

Correct your spelling

courses

show examples

is undeniable. Since most of the careers require qualified employees who have academic backgrounds,

school

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

should devote enough amount of their time to gaining a great deal of knowledge about their

school

subjects

and

acquire

Wrong verb form

acquiring

show examples

different practical skills.

Such

courses will provide a wider range of job opportunities as they spend enough time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

learning useful

academic

Fix the agreement mistake

academics

show examples

in their

school

ages

Fix the agreement mistake

age

show examples

. In my honest opinion, schools should place a premium on both

subjects

because each of which

are

Change the verb form

show examples

vitally important. Even though the main purpose of attending

school

is gaining academic knowledge, mental and physical health should be considered because a qualified educated person will not be successful unless he or she is physically and mentally in good status. In conclusion, physical

school

classes and academics Are two

subjects

on which children should focus during their

school

times, but their importance is still debatable .

Submitted by suna.habibi on Sun Jan 31 2021

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task response

Ensure that the response thoroughly addresses all parts of the task. Develop your arguments and provide a clear opinion on the importance of physical education and academic subjects. Use specific examples to support your points.

coherence and cohesion

Organize your ideas in a more structured and coherent way. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the essay flows logically from one point to the next.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

physical education (PE)
holistic development
lifelong healthy habits
academic performance
core subjects
teamwork
discipline
social skills
critical thinking skills
information age
balanced approach
holistic education

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Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time discus both these views, and give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Police in some countries like England don't carry guns. Some people don't approve of this because they think that police with guns gives them security. Others think that police carrying guns decreases crimes. What is your opinion? Give relevant examples and experiences.

The idea of going overseas for university study is an exciting prospect for many people. But while it may offer some advantages, it is probably better to stay home beause of the difficulties a student inevitably encounters living and studying in different culture.

Too much emphasis is given for the education of students . More government money should be spent on free time activities for young people . To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other type of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.