IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people believe that it is important to give gifts to friends and family to show that we care about them . Others think that there are better ways to show that we care .Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #gifts #friends #show #care
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Nevertheless
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, presents are different
way
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 to
show
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love
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 to people around us . A segment of society believes that giving gifts and presents is the better
way
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 to
show
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 our affection for our near and dear ones , other opine that there are effective methods to
show
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 that we
care
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.I agree with
this
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 statement and give my opinion in the upcoming paragraphs .
To begin
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 with,some individuals thought that
this
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 is a better
way
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 to
show
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 your
care
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 to family and buddies. A person can make his
relationship
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 stronger by giving flairs and presents on some special occasions to exemplify marriages , birthday parties , anniversaries and baby showers . To illustrate people giving expensive items to family members express their feelings and
love
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 . Few individuals build a new
relationship
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 by giving some precious gifts to each other .The argument is that since they are miles apart Nothing can prove their
love
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 as well as these gifts . On the flip side , other people think that there are various ways other than gifting to
show
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love
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.Some Indian families the daughter in law
show
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 caring nature serving her inlaws and looking after them.
Likewise
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 , son in law may provide his wife's parents.
As a result
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Add a comma
,
show examples
a family bonding increase and build a healthy strong
relationship
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. The quality time spends with family and friend's is a better
way
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 to
show
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 affection and
care
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 . In my opinion,expensive things are not always necessary to reveal affection .The other method
such
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 as spending precious time with loving dear ones and taking
care
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 of physically and emotion play's an important role in showing
care
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 . In conclusion , a gift sometimes
show
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 serves as a means to
show
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c
Add an article
a
show examples
aring nature,especially long-distance
relationship
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.
Otherwise
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 spend quality time with family is a better
way
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 to
show
Use synonyms
 we
care
Use synonyms
 .
Submitted by naresh on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Tangible symbols
  • Affection
  • Materialism
  • Cultural traditions
  • Impact
  • Relationships
  • Quality time
  • Acts of service
  • Communication
  • Shared experiences
  • Equating
  • Emotional presence
  • Physical presence
  • Material possessions
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