IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Many people say that cooking and eating at home is better for the individual and the family than eating out in restaurants or canteens. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #home #restaurants #canteens
Wide
Correct article usage
A wide
show examples
 variety of tastes are in the market named as Continental, Chinese, Italian, Indian and many more. People are heavily indulged
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 work so prefer to eat
from
Change preposition
at
show examples
 fancy restaurants with wide menu options. It is believed by some part of society to prefer homemade
food
 but outdoors. I moderately consent
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the affirmation
due to
 remarkable grounds that I will be weighing up in forthcoming sections.
To begin
 with, Something cooked on our own, not only provides
with
Correct pronoun usage
us with
show examples
 a unique level of happiness but
also
 ensures quality and hygiene. It could be customized as per our requirements.
For instance
, Street snack
due to
 heavy spices or quality of bread has bad consequences on health. On the same line, Dinners and
meals
Fix the agreement mistake
meal
show examples
 prices
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
skyrocketed. With the billing amount of one meal, one can afford groceries for a fortnight.
Moreover
, Cooking is a hobby for many to escape from reality for
sometime
Replace the word
some time
show examples
.
On the contrary
, In
this
High tech
Correct your spelling
High-tech
show examples
 and competitive era, often people are on business tours and are thoroughly putting
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
to meet
Change preposition
into meeting
show examples
 task deadlines. During all
this
, Looking out to restaurants for
food
 is the most favourable choice.
Also
, By visiting social gatherings, one can divert the mind from busy schedules for a
while
 and try to be a social animal. Preferring canteen
food
 once
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a week or two weeks is
also
 bearable by the body. To cap it all, Balance between
home-made
Correct your spelling
homemade
show examples
 and street
food
 is acceptable. I opine
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not to stick to
Correct article usage
a
show examples
single aspect only but to go for either of them occasionally.
Submitted by kaurharpreet23 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote
  • healthier
  • ingredients
  • portion sizes
  • strengthen
  • family bonds
  • expensive
  • budget
  • creative
  • enjoyable
  • foodborne illnesses
  • reduces
  • food waste
  • relaxed
  • comfortable
  • atmosphere
  • dietary restrictions
  • preferences
  • unhealthy
  • weight gain
What to do next:
Look at other essays: