Some people think that lawbreakers should be sent to prison. However, others think that better talents among those should be made to work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #lawbreakers #prison #talents #work

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There has been a significant rise in

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

criminal activities, in several nations.

However

, an array of masses favours the notion of detention to criminals and others consider adequate to proffer employment opportunities. Ideas related to both views would be captivated in the following paragraphs. There are a plethora of reasons behind supporting conviction in context to offenders. When they would be declared

guity

Correct your spelling

guilty

in the court airing, the involvement of the criminals in offensive

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

would swell because

this

practice would make them fearless.

As a result

, after absolving from jail, they would stimulate innocent civilians who reside on a breadline by alluring them with fruitful finance and would make their gangs larger by inciting them to join the same.

For example

, if a gangster gets 8 years jail after performing severe heist

then

after absolvation, he would make his gang even more strong by inviting disadvantageous folks who are already discarded by the society.

Nonetheless

, as

every

Change the determiner

everyone

each

show examples

has a

birth right

Correct your spelling

birthright

show examples

to obtain a lease on life, the

convictors

Correct your spelling

convictions

conviction

convectors

should

also

be heaved a sigh of relief by the higher authorities after

dtermining

Correct your spelling

determining

the cause behind illicit deed because in most of the rudimentary nations, majority of populace dwells below the poverty line and sometimes it becomes a herculean task for them to earn bread and butter for their families due to illness and finance crunch.

Therefore

this

sort of condition provokes them to commit

crime

Add an article

a crime

the crime

show examples

Thus

, it is a liability of the legislators to offer them

with

Verify preposition usage

apply

show examples

employment opportunities in their fascinated field of profession.

Therefore

, they would be potent enough to live hand to mouth and

this

situation would automatically prevent them to be miscreant. To conclude,

although

, the government

sould

Correct your spelling

should

could

provide severe conviction to the miscreant people, yet the importance of providing them with a breath of fresh air after absolvation cannot be neglected.

Thus

, the councils should provide detention to offenders according to

severety

Correct your spelling

severity

of their

offense

Change the spelling

offence

show examples

Submitted by jatinderpanaich328 on Mon Feb 08 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

323 words

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Some people think that lawbreakers should be sent to prison. However, others think that better talents among those should be made to work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries of the world, cars are replacing bicycles. However, in some countries, bicycles are replacing cars. What are the reasons for these two developments? In your opinion, which one is better?

The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweigh is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweigh people? How can this problem be solved?

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new fast trains between cities. others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem?