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Band 5

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.?

#technologies #children #time
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In recent times,
technology
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 has altered
children
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’s recreational activities in their spare time. Thanks to the variety offered via online useful
games
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, they can acquire beneficial
skills
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.
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However
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,However
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 I believe that those merits are eclipsed by the detrimental impacts of the use of
technology
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 on their social lives and health. Admittedly, technological advances hold two possible benefits from
implementation
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the implementation
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 of
technology
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 in the entertainment options. . The
first
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 fruitful virtue is the diversity of online
games
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 introduced for
children
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. To illustrate, since they have access to numerous
games
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 especially tailored for various age stages, they never get bored
unlike
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,unlike
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 other physical-demanding
games
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. Another feasible merit is that those
games
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 help
children
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 develop their cognitive
skills
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.
For instance
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, via devices
such
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 as VR glasses, they can immerse themselves in a virtual reality world.
Therefore
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,
this
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 definitely boosts their imagination
skills
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.
Nevertheless
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,
technology
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 has multiple adverse outcomes in terms of
children
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’s health as well as their social lives. Physically, as they have become obsessed with those time-passing online activities, they usually abstain any physical effort
games
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.
This
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 is highly noticed in the exponential rise in the obesity figures of
children
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.
Additionally
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,
on
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in
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 the long term, they suffer from
eye sight
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eyesight
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 impairments owing to spending much time on screens. Not only do they encounter health disorders, but they
also
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 experience
isolated
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an isolated
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 life. Once they engage in virtual communication, they cannot develop
social
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the social
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skills
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 needed for real contact.
This
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 will negatively affect their relationships with either their parents or mates resulting in
further
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 repercussions. To conclude, from my perspective, I assume that negative outcomes from using
technology
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 as a mean of entertaining
children
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 are more significant than the benefits. Even if they can enjoy their leisure time and improve their cognitive
skills
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, they are susceptible to
sedentary
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a sedentary
the sedentary
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 lifestyle and several diseases.
Submitted by emanibrahim51191 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital literacy
  • Cyberbullying
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Inappropriate content
  • Self-learning
  • Screen time
  • Social inequality
  • Enhanced communication
  • Creative expression
  • Educational resources
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