Some people think that women should not be allowed to work in the police force. Do you agree or disagree?

In
this
contemporary epoch,
women
are presented with abundant opportunities in every field to portray their skills. One
such
area of work wherein
participation
Correct article usage
the participation

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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of
women
has caused a lot of controversies is the
police
force
. The opponents of
this
view believe that because of certain limitations which females have as compared to their male counterparts, they should be refrained from joining the
police
.
However
, I contend that
this
bias is unnecessary and
women
can prove as an asset to the team. To commence with, the cardinal reason why people oppose
women
in
police
Add an article
the police

The noun phrase police force seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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force
is
because
Replace the word
that

It appears that the conjunction because is the wrong word choice after reason is. Consider changing it to that or rewriting the sentence.

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this
profession needs a lot of physical strength to deal with unexpected situations
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially

It appears that you are missing a comma or two with the interrupter especially at crime scenes. Consider adding the comma(s).

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at crime scenes. Indeed, the strength of men and
women
cannot be measured on
a
Change the article
the

It appears that the phrase a same scale does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

show examples
same scale because of the differences in the body composition that they have but
this
can be countered with the right skills.
For example
, there are many techniques like the Asian form called Jusitju which gives an upper hand to
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
women
a woman

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun women in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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women
in a fight.
Thus
,
women
must be trained to deal with situations that can help them use their strength in the right place when required. Another important factor is that unlike men, who are wielding power and authority,
women
are more inclined towards making a compromise which gives them an upper hand when dealing with offenders as it requires good questioning and negotiation skills.
Also
, having a
women
police
accompany the female criminal adds a layer of trust in the system and avoids any possibility of misbehaviour that can happen during the arrest. To give an example, it is mandatory in my country for a female officer to accompany a woman offender when arresting during night hours. To recapitulate, I firmly believe that having
women
in
police
Add an article
the police

The noun phrase police force seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
force
can add immense value and strengthen the team.
However
, it is the responsibility of the government to ensure that appropriate training is imparted to the female
force
.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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