IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well-educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#children #time #television #book #tool
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The current generation of
children
Use synonyms
 is spending most of their time in front of the
television
Use synonyms
. Anyway,
television
Use synonyms
 cannot play the role of a
book
Use synonyms
 as a learning utility,
hence
Linking Words
children
Use synonyms
 these days are not experts in education. I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement. I believe that
television
Use synonyms
 play a key role in
children
Use synonyms
's education and capable enough to replace books.
Firstly
Linking Words
, digital media is an apt replacement for books, it helps
children
Use synonyms
 to learn many things quickly especially for elementary school
children
Use synonyms
. Small
children
Use synonyms
 find it difficult to read and memorise the alphabets and numbers from a
book
Use synonyms
 whereas the same content is easy to ready listening and watching from
television
Use synonyms
, in the form of rhymes.
For example
Linking Words
, my daughter was struggling to learn number names by reading a
book
Use synonyms
, but she learned the same content watching a
children
Use synonyms
's channel on
television
Use synonyms
 very quickly and
furthermore
Linking Words
, her mother tongue is Telugu and now she started learning the English language watching cartoons in English.
Secondly
Linking Words
, watching
television
Use synonyms
 help
children
Use synonyms
 relive their stress, make them more creative, and help their school subjects easy to understand.
For example
Linking Words
, nowadays, most
television
Use synonyms
 channels are telecasting content related to arts and animal geography which help
children
Use synonyms
 to relax and at the same time to increase their general knowledge watching them, after they reach home from the whole day of schooling.
However
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
 required to focus on their books as well
although
Linking Words
 they have a great learning curve watching TV as ,after a certain age, the
book
Use synonyms
 plays a key role in academics. In conclusion,
children
Use synonyms
 spend their time in front of the TV impacting their education as digital media cannot replace a
book
Use synonyms
. I do not agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement. I believe that
television
Use synonyms
 is providing many learning opportunities for
children
Use synonyms
 and helping them to learn many things in an easier way.
Submitted by jj on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: