Some people argue that obtaining a university degree is the best way to secure a good job, while others contend that work experience is more highly valued by employers. In this essay, I will explore both perspectives before providing my own opinion:

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On one hand, a
university
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degree
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is often seen as the key to career success. Many employers, particularly in specialized fields
such
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as medicine, engineering, law, and academia, require candidates to possess formal qualifications. A
degree
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not only provides the necessary theoretical knowledge but
also
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offers proof of a candidate’s ability to complete rigorous academic training.
In addition
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,
university
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curriculums are designed to equip students with transferable skills, including problem-solving, time management, and critical thinking. These skills are highly regarded in various professional environments.
For instance
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, graduates who have completed internships or group projects during their studies often enter the
job
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market with enhanced collaboration and communication skills, which are crucial in most workplaces.
On the other hand
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, some argue that practical
experience
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holds more weight than academic credentials. In today’s rapidly changing
job
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market, many employers prioritize hands-on
experience
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over formal education.
Work
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experience
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allows individuals to apply theoretical knowledge in real-world situations, often leading to a deeper understanding of the field.
Moreover
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, employees who have spent years working in a particular industry are often more adept at navigating the challenges and nuances of the
job
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.
For example
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, someone with several years of
experience
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in marketing may have a better grasp of current market trends and consumer
behavior
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behaviour
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than a graduate with just a
degree
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but no practical exposure.
Furthermore
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, many positions, especially in industries
such
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as technology and trade, value specific skill sets and expertise gained through
experience
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rather than academic qualifications. In my opinion, both a
university
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degree
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and
work
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experience
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are important, but their relative importance depends on the industry in question.
While
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a
degree
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is indispensable for fields that require technical knowledge and certification,
such
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as medicine or law,
work
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experience
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is often more critical in industries like business, technology, and the creative arts. Ultimately, a combination of both academic qualifications and practical
experience
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is the ideal foundation for long-term career success. In conclusion,
while
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some people believe that a
university
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degree
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is essential for securing a good
job
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, others argue that
work
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experience
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is more important. I believe that the significance of each depends on the specific demands of the
job
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. A balanced approach, combining education and practical
experience
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, is the most effective way to achieve career success.

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports your overall argument and that the ideas are logically connected. You can achieve this by using more linking words and phrases for smooth transitions between points.
task achievement
Strengthen the examples in your essay by providing specific instances or studies that reflect your arguments, particularly in the comparison between education and experience.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both perspectives on the importance of a university degree versus work experience, which shows critical thinking.
coherence and cohesion
Your use of varied sentence structures and vocabulary is commendable, contributing to the overall engagement of the essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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