IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #sites #impact #individuals #society
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With
the
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internet technology popularity, social networking sites have a huge impact on both individuals and society. Some
people
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 believe that the effect of cyber social sites is negative. I strongly agree with
this
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 opinion.
To begin
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 with, the internet system is cost-effective and convenient for individuals.
This
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 means that all
kinds
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 of human behaviours have been moving from the real world to a virtual world, which can promote
people
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 to finish many works efficiently, make friends widely, and discuss all
kinds
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 of topics whenever and wherever possible.
However
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,
people
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 are inevitable to lose many healthy habits,
such
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 as, the global meeting leads many
people
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 who have to work at night to suffer from a long time sitting down a side of the desk talking with colleagues or customers from
different
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the different
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 city across the world.
This
Linking Words
 kind of sedentary lifestyles definitely impacts
people
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’s health negatively, which cause many serious illnesses to workers
such
Linking Words
 as heart disease or obesity.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the trait of
high performance
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high-performance
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 internet social network is irreversible to promote many societies running efficiently, while it absolutely
draw
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draws
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 attention to some
people
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 commit all
kinds
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 of
cyber crimes
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cybercrimes
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. Through building network chat rooms, pasting pornographies, spreading
rumors
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rumours
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, making fake news, so that they can push drugs, illegally gamble, overhaul some crucial verdicts like a result of national voting. Those activities deeply deteriorate our societies, which make the mechanism of society not longer high quality. To summaries, technological progress has been overwhelming all
kinds
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 of conventional customs, beliefs, norms and values. I hold a conservative opinion and pessimistically think that
negative
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the negative
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 side of social network sites must to change
orientation
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the orientation
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 of our living to twilight.
Submitted by henrybeee on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social isolation
  • virtual interactions
  • mental health
  • feelings of inadequacy
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • misinformation
  • destabilize
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • productivity
  • foster connections
  • educational content
  • social activism
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