Some people think that men are naturally more competitive than women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some may argue that males are more competitive in nature than females.

This

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essay completely agrees with

this

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statement because many women are soft-hearted,

while

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men

Use synonyms

have higher egos. On the one hand, most women are less competitive than

men

Use synonyms

because they have a soft heart. Most of them cry easily , especially when they see that their family and friends are crying. They always care about the feelings of others. Their instinct is to help people rather than to compete with them.

For instance

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, in one of the marathons in the US, one competitor was leading the race since the beginning,

however

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, when she was near the finish line she experienced muscle cramps but the runner who came after her helped her cross the finish line.

As a result

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, she won first place in the race.

Thus

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, the soft-heartedness of a woman makes them less competitive.

On the other hand

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men

Use synonyms

are significantly competitive because they have a high ego. They always want to win because they think that failing will lose their masculinity.

Instead

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of using their heart, they always use their mind

Remove the comma

apply

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and are always focused on their goals.

That is

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why a huge number of sports competitions are dominated by

men

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because they are determined to win.

For example

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, Lebron James transferred to different teams because he wanted to prove that he could win them a championship ring. Their egocentric trait is what makes them more competitive than their counterpart. In conclusion, males are significantly more competitive than most females and I completely agree with

this

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statement. Their competitiveness is because of their ego,

while

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most women are less competitive because they often use their hearts in everything they do.

yoko.oneromTue Feb 27 2024

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task achievement

Strengthen the structure of your argument by delving deeper into the reasons behind the natural competitiveness of men and women. Consider including more nuanced viewpoints to showcase a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

task achievement

Aim for a more balanced argument by acknowledging counterarguments or variations within gender groups. This can reveal a deeper insight into the complexities of human behavior and competitiveness.

coherence and cohesion

Enhance your logical structure by ensuring a smooth transition between paragraphs and points. Explicitly signpost your argument's progression to guide the reader through your essay without confusion.

coherence and cohesion

Revisit the introduction and conclusion to ensure they specifically address the essay topic and provide a summarised view of your argument. This strengthens the essay's focus and overall cohesion.

coherence and cohesion

Employ a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more effectively. This can improve the essay's flow and make your arguments more coherent.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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Some people think that men are naturally more competitive than women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Some people believe that studying at university or collage is the best route to a successful career. While others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion

IT IS COMMONLY BELIEVE THAT NOWADAYS MAIN FACTOR THAT AFFECT A CHILD’S DEVELOPMENT ARE MEDIA,POP CULTURE AND FRIENDS.A DIFFERENT POINT OF VIEW IS THAT FAMILY PLAYS THE MOST SIGNIFICANT ROLE.DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION

You want to sell your television. You think a friend of yours might like to buy it from you. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: • Explain why you are selling the television. • Describe the television. • Suggest a date when your friend can come and see it.

Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society that is specialized for preparing to be good fathers and mothers teach their kids. To what extent you agree or disagree.

Many people believe that it is easier to lead a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. Others believe that there are health benefits to living in cities. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.