Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #parties #birthday #celebrations #waste #money #individuals #society

Spending a lot of

money

birthday

parties

or at a wedding party is a wastage of

money

according to some

people

. Others believe that celebration is vital for

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

society and an individual and I agree with

this

view. Some

people

are of the opinion that

money

should not be wasted on marriage or

birthday

parties

. They say that

money

is precious and should be saved for the future.

Future

Correct article usage

The future

show examples

is unpredictable. Funds should be saved for an emergency rather than wasting it on celebrations.

Moreover

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

money

could be saved for education.

One

could pursue higher education with the

money

they have saved.

One

the other hand,

people

believe that celebrating birthdays brings harmony

Change preposition

into

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.

People

get together under

one

roof and enjoy the celebration. They become a part of the party and share happiness. For an individual,

these

Change the determiner

this

show examples

celebration brings closeness.

One

cannot live alone, which is why wedding

parties

birthday

parties

brings

Change the verb form

bring

show examples

people

together.

As a result

, a person gets to share happiness with others

hence

bring

people

together. I believe in

this

view.

Money

could be saved for a secure future. Despite

this

one

could not live alone in

this

world. So celebrations bring

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society and an individual together and

brings

Change the verb form

bring

show examples

harmony. In conclusion, considering the aforementioned view, in my opinion,

one

should celebrate weddings and

birthday

parties

Submitted by tazeenferozwork on Sat Mar 06 2021

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

227 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

extravagant
frivolous
lavish
unnecessary
excessive
consumerism
unrealistic
social bonds
milestones
local businesses
celebrate
memorable
nostalgic
cherish
community

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Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Last month you had a holiday overseas.Where you stay with some friends.They just sent you some holiday photos. Write a letter your friends,in your letter. •thank them for the holiday and the photos •explain why do you didn't write earlier •invite them to come and stay with you

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvato ntages of this development? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience to support your arguments

In many cities, there is little control on the design and construction of new houses. Some people think that people can choose to build houses in their own styles instead of building them with the same style as the old house style in local areas. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In many developing countries there’s an increasing movement of workers from rural areas into the city Why do you think this happens? What problems can this cause?