Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#believe #action #crime

There is no doubt that criminal activities

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

geared exceedingly globally.

However

, while some believe that these

offenses

Change the spelling

offences

show examples

are handled productively than before, I would agree with those who argue that strict actions are still required to control

crime

. To commence with

its

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show examples

is important to consider the

invovlement

Correct your spelling

involvement

of numerous technological advances in curtailing

crime

Correct article usage

the crime

show examples

rate.

This

becuase

Correct your spelling

because

,the observation and detection of a

crime

under CCTV surveillance

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

actively enhanced the power of police to catch the criminal. To cite an example, if a

theif

Correct your spelling

thief

, who enters

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a money bank with an intention of conducting a robbery might get caught leading him directly towards imprisonment due to the presence of

camera

Add an article

the camera

a camera

show examples

in that

pemises

Correct your spelling

premises

Also

, in many facilities nowadays, there are siren and

burgler

Correct your spelling

burglar

alarm systems installed to prevent the

occurance

Correct your spelling

occurrence

crime

and for safety reasons.

Thus

, now illegal acts are tackled in a more effective manner which was not the case earlier.

However

, I

beleive

Correct your spelling

believe

that the enforcement of

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strict punishment is the only way to minimise

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

major crimes

such

as murder or acid attacks. The reason for

this

is that unwitnessed or

crime

are considered as

bailable

Add an article

a bailable

show examples

offence which strengthens the criminal's will to repeat the action

agian

Correct your spelling

again

Submitted by jhalakbakshi1992 on Sat Mar 06 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

204 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe that they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In this technological personal information of all kinds is held on computer by different companies and organization in many countries. Do the advantages of this development out weigh the disadvantages?

Some people think robots are very important to humans' future development while others think they are dangerous and have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Nowadays more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? What are the solutions for this problem?

some people believe that all children should learn a foreign language from the time they start school, while others feel it is better to wait until a child is at secondary school