Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that has only a minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

These days, there is an ongoing debate between
people
about the
culture
of the person influenced by the county of origin. While other
people
claim that it does not have
major
Add an article
a major

The noun phrase major impact seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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impact
of
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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origin
Correct article usage
the origin

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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of
Country
Correct article usage
the Country

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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, as per my view both the arguments have validity and I shall explain my point of view by analysing both sides of the argument. The main reason which impacts
the
Remove the article
apply

It appears that the is unnecessary in this context. Consider removing it.

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human mostly is the place where they were born and raised. The lifestyle is mostly biased by the native
culture
for example
food, the spices are the important ingredient of Indian cuisine. It should
also
be taken into account that traditional music, folk dance are mostly enjoyed by the
people
, which come from their country of origin. On the other side, we should consider the effect of Globalisation. Many
people
travel around the world for
business
Add an article
a business
the business

The noun phrase business, job seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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, job or for the interest which
provide
Change the verb form
provides

The plural verb provide does not appear to agree with the singular subject the interest. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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exposure to different cultures. In
this
situation, humans look forward and adapt to the surroundings of the place which bring a change in the
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour

The spelling of behavior is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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or way of life,
for
instance
Add the comma(s)
,instance

It appears that you are missing a comma or two with the interrupter for instance. Consider adding the comma(s).

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people
who have migrated to other countries
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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like the music or clothing of that region. While there are strong arguments on both sides of the case, my personal opinion is that
people
change their way of living as per the place and start adapting to a new
culture
. I would strongly say that everyone has the liberty to enjoy life as they wish and there is no much impact
of
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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where they came from. All together humans are social animals and have all rights to follow any
culture
which suits
him
Correct pronoun usage
them

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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.
Submitted by NehaC on

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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