Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. on the other hand other people think that getting experiences and developing soft skills is more important . Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#university #education #job #hand #people #experiences #skills

While some people are in

favor

Change the spelling

favour

show examples

of higher

education

because it helps

job

hunting, others argue that real-life

experiences

are more important for the young. Both sides have good reasons but I personally incline to support the latter. I will analyze the advantages of both options and give my reasons why

experiences

are more plausible for the young. Admittedly,

university

education

can develop

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

young in various ways.

To begin

with, it allows youngsters to concentrate on

one

specilisation

Correct your spelling

specialisation

specialization

. During a period of three or four years, students will learn in-depth about

one

subject and develop

Remove the article

apply

show examples

particular expertise.

For instance

one

can become a software engineer after pursuing a major

Change preposition

show examples

computer science.

Secondly

university

diplomas will be helpful in the

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

market. Nowadays, it is ubiquitous for employers to ask for a college

education

regardless of the

job

type.

Thus

graduate

Add an article

the graduate

a graduate

show examples

certificate will be definitely helpful in the process of

job

hunting.

Nevertheless

, I believe that professional

experiences

are far more crucial and beneficial to the young. While

university

students focus only on academics and theories, young professionals will learn fast at a real

job

and acquire a lot of practical soft

skills

that they could not get from schooling. As an example, we will develop teamwork

skills

and leadership while collaborating with coworkers. These

skills

be benefit

Change the verb form

benefit

show examples

the individual for a lifetime.

Furthermore

, there are

also

financial benefits. Youngsters will be compensated as soon as they enter the workforce.

This

will allow them to become independent and improve their standards of life without worrying about the loans that they might

otherwise

take if they chose to go to

university

. In conclusion,

university

Correct article usage

a university

show examples

education

is useful if

one

wants to learn hard

skills

and become

expert

Correct article usage

an expert

show examples

one

area. But it will be more practical for most of us to get more real-world

experiences

, acquire more useful soft

skills

and to earn our lives earlier. For

this

reason, I encourage young people to consider entering the

job

market as early as they can.

Submitted by henggu on Tue Mar 09 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

335 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. on the other hand other people think that getting experiences and developing soft skills is more important . Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Some argue that music mainly serves as a way for individuals to reduce their stress and anxiety. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that companies should manufacturing products that last for a long time. Others feel that the emphasis should be place on producing goods that are cheap. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. Do you agree or disagree?