IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Smoking is a major cause of serious illness and death throughout the world today. In the interest of public health, governments should ban cigarettes and other tobacco products. Do you agree or disagree?

#illness #death #world #interest #health #governments #ban #cigarettes #tobacco #products
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Use synonyms
Use
Correct article usage
The use
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 of
cigarettes
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 is the main reason for many diseases
all
Verify preposition usage
overall
aroundall
show examples
 the world.
Forbitting
Correct your spelling
Forbidding
 the tobaccos by
goverment
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government
 would be
precise
Add an article
a precise
show examples
 way for public wellness. I
definetely
Correct your spelling
definitely
 disagree with
this
Linking Words
 idea and I will elaborate on my opinion in
further
Linking Words
 paragraphs. In the world,
unfortunately
Add a comma
,unfortunately
show examples
 many
people
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 have been smoking
cigarettes
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 and any other smoking products. I think it is impossible to avoid that and
this
Linking Words
 is not
right
Add an article
the right
show examples
 way
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 many reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, all
people
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burns
Change the verb form
burn
show examples
 as a free human and can make her own decisions included smoking cigarette.
Secondly
Linking Words
, what if
this
Linking Words
 idea came true and government officials prohibited
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use
Correct article usage
the use
show examples
 of
cigarettes
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 and any
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other smoking products. It will
probbably
Correct your spelling
probably
 result in unwanted consequences like
Use synonyms
use
Add an article
the use
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 of drugs
instead
Linking Words
 of
cigarette
Add an article
a cigarette
show examples
. I
unterstand
Correct your spelling
understand
people
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 who think that avoiding tobacco consume would be
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
 thing for humanity. But, It could conclude many ramifications as I said.
Rising
Correct article usage
The rising
show examples
 of drug
use
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 would be too bad for
people
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 and there are lots of example about that.
For example
Linking Words
, in my country, there is no any ban
about
Change preposition
on
show examples
cigarettes
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 but every year there is a price increase on tobaccos and due to
this
Linking Words
 rising many
people
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 prefer to
use
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 some cheap drugs relative to
legal
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the legal
show examples
 smoking product.
Therefore
Linking Words
, both mental and physical health
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 been in danger for
people
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. In conclusion, I severely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 proposal and I believe that
this
Linking Words
 can cause reverse effects on
people
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.
That is
Linking Words
 why
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should not think
Linking Words
this
Change preposition
about this
show examples
implemention
Correct your spelling
implementation
.
Submitted by tugaydemir08 on

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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