Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#women #childcare #men #focus #children #life

It is suggested that females make better caregivers as compared to men

therefore

they should concentrate on raising a family more than on a career. I agree with

this

point of view as I believe that

women

are gifted with natural instincts and nurturing tendencies.

Firstly

women

are gifted caregivers

therefore

, it is often said that they are better at childcare because they are perceived to have natural instincts.

This

virtue comes naturally to a woman

for example

, when most

women

encounter complex situations like a fire incident, their

first

course of action is to save others or think of solutions for the best possible outcomes

instead

of removing themselves from the situation. To give a clear example, it was broadcasted a while ago, a fire incident broke out at a Catholic boarding school, it was retold by the survivors that the supervisor who happens to be a nun made sure her students all got out alive but she

unfortunately

Add the comma(s)

,unfortunately

show examples

, lost hers.

Therefore

these characteristics that many

women

possess, set them apart from their male counterparts .

Secondly

women

are natural nurturers because they exhibit diverse characteristics

such

as patience, warmth, they are easily approachable, they

also

tend to give lots of genuine compliments. All these mentioned are very important in terms of childcare.

Furthermore

, many

women

are soft-hearted and tend to pay attention to intimate details.

For instance

, many doctors have stated that they prefer mothers accompanying their kids to the hospital because they are likely to get the correct information about important details of the child. In conclusion,

women

were naturally built to be caregivers,

although

they can decide to pursue a career if they want to,

however

, in my opinion, I think that

women

being present in the formative years of their children would be highly beneficial to all parties involved.

Submitted by ochuksemeordiblessing on Mon Mar 22 2021

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

304 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

gender roles
nurturing
empathy
sensitivity
maternal instinct
paternal involvement
child's development
work-life balance
gender equality

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Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Nowaways, more teenagers want to become famous actors or singers. Why do you think this is happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

In many workplaces, online communication is getting more common than meeting face to face. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing, and their level of health and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Economic progress is often used to measure a country’s success. However, some people believe that other factors are more important. What other factors should also be considered when measuring a country’s success? Which one do you think is the most important?