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Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #teenagers #work #money #lessons #shouldn #sacrifice #rest #activities
There is a popular belief that adolescents who
work
 post to their study
time
 tend to be more productive once they take up a new role after studies,
however
, there are
also
 people who believe that rest is the most important part of the after-
school
 activities. I feel that part-
time
 jobs after
school
 plays a major role in the development of a student. Students who take up
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
 jobs are able to apply what they have learned in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
.
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
this
 helps in
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 understanding of the concepts taught. For an instance, a student who attended a computer science class, and working as a library assistant can easily relate how the concepts of computer science classes can help in designing a library management software. Another benefit of working during the after
school
 hours is that it helps in managing stress. As these students are already exposed to
real life
Add a hyphen
real-life
show examples
 scenarios at
work
, they have already gained a lot of experience in dealing
and
Change preposition
with and
show examples
 handling stressful situations. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example, a teenager who works in
restaurant
Add an article
the restaurant
a restaurant
show examples
 will already have experience in handling multiple customer queries and finding suitable solutions.
Although
 there are benefits of working, there are
also
 disadvantages to these. A more common disadvantage is the lack of quality
time
 with family. Due to the hectic schedule at
school
 and
work
, it will be tremendously difficult to find
time
 for family and friends.
This
 can gradually lead to
decline
Add an article
a decline
show examples
 in the quality of mental health. As an example, an adolescent studying at
school
 has to report for duty as soon as the classes are over and can have
work
time
 extended to late nights, it will be very difficult for him to share his feelings once he reaches home, as he will be exhausted by
then
.
This
 can slowly
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 the strength of the relationships with family and can even compel
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
 lead a lonely life. The benefits of working after
school
 hours have various benefits and
which
Delete the pronoun
apply
show examples
also
 outcome its drawbacks.
Hence
, teenagers should choose to
work
 during their free times,
however
 keeping in mind that they maintain a balance between studies,
work
 and life.
Submitted by Hisham Musthafa on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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