It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought together.

Families are not as close as they used to be. At least in countries from the western
hemisphere
Add a comma
,hemisphere
show examples
this
is a sad reality
that is
shared by all social classes, from E to A. The close unit that helped to shape our society through thousands of years is steadily
disapearing
Correct your spelling
disappearing
, bringing together significant
psicological
Correct your spelling
psychological
, educational and
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
impacts. Why
such
a trend is
occuring
Correct your spelling
occurring
? There is not a single or a simple answers for that. In reality, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
a multitude of drivers with different weights according to the social extract which by it was affected.
Nevertheless
Add a comma
,Nevertheless
show examples
we can pinpoint the industrial revolution as the common historical element and as the igniting force behind all of them. With the advent of the Industrial Revolution, strong economical forces were unleashed, creating social chaos, disintegration and progress.
Humain
Correct your spelling
Human
beings were reduced to the role of instruments for profits. Men, women and children were not spared. Long and exhausting journeys replaced hours of family quality time together. Even those with more economic resources were
also
affected. Money, leisure and hedonism had a tremendous moral impact. Selfishness and the
agressive
Correct your spelling
aggressive
serach
Correct your spelling
search
for pleasure and adventure ruined many marriages. Not
surpisingly
Correct your spelling
surprisingly
the
abundancy
Correct your spelling
abundance
show examples
of material resources
also
created terrible feuds between relatives fighting for their share in the inheritance. The consequences of
this
situation are clear. Depression, social instability and
lackof
Correct your spelling
lack of
colaboration
Correct your spelling
collaboration
.
Although
the state of
desintegration
Correct your spelling
disintegration
is advanced, it is possible to recover part of the magic of living in families. Of
course
Add a comma
,course
show examples
families now should be seen in a
differect
Correct your spelling
different
perspective,
incorpoarting
Correct your spelling
incorporating
the evolution of society
inclusivesness
Correct your spelling
inclusiveness
.
Technology
Add an article
The technology
show examples
could
also
support
this
endeavour by providing tools that make
easier
Correct pronoun usage
it easier
show examples
for people to keep connected despite
long
Add an article
the long
show examples
distance. There is not a single solution. To reestablish the benefits of living in
family
Correct article usage
a family
show examples
will demand a change in attitude, but the profits for both individual and societies are clear: the
restablishment
Correct your spelling
establishment
reestablishment
of a state of belonging, sharing and
colaboration
Correct your spelling
collaboration
. No doubt that
this
is a
valuos
Correct your spelling
values
value
reward!
Submitted by joseneto.sp on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • family interactions
  • technological advancements
  • virtual interactions
  • dual-income households
  • urbanization
  • migration
  • social structures
  • individualism
  • family cohesiveness
  • belonging
  • open communication
  • emotional support
  • shared activities
  • family dynamics
  • work-life balance
  • family traditions
  • regular gatherings
  • counseling
  • family therapy
  • prioritizing family time
What to do next:
Look at other essays: