IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

More and more people nowadays are buying fashionable clothes. Does it have a more negative or positive effects? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your experience

#people #clothes #effects
there is a significant increase in
prefering
Correct your spelling
preferring
 brandy materials among
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 .while
this
 may have a negative impact there is
also
 a positive effect. I believe
such
 phenomena leaves
equal
Add an article
an equal
show examples
 impression. in
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I am going to highlight both advantages and disadvantages of
this
 matter . many societies live for their status ,fashioned
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
one
 of their
prorioties
Correct your spelling
priorities
properties
 . they consider it the most important part of their life when it comes to attending events
becasuse
Correct your spelling
because
 they believe in
such
Correct your spelling
way
show examples
away
Correct your spelling
a way
show examples
 they get the
audiance
Correct your spelling
audience
 attention which may lead to
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
positive outcomes
such
 as more
intersts
Correct your spelling
interests
 in investing in areas related to them and consquenecely growth of their
forntue
Correct your spelling
fortune
.
furthermore
,
fashioned
Correct article usage
a fashioned
show examples
comunity
Correct your spelling
community
Comunity
 will
recruite
Correct your spelling
recruit
 more tourists to its place where strangers will feel safe to visit them sensing that
such
 folks are upgraded and aware about outers so no fear to
come
Add the particle
tocome
show examples
 visit . in terms of negative
aspectes
Correct your spelling
aspects
 of the stylish
coton
Correct your spelling
cotton
Coton
 infiltration, traditions and culture will be the front line against it for
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of reasons,
firstly
 once nation
promots
Correct your spelling
promotes
 fashioned goods, it stumbles over the principle followed for a long time by ancestors which is according to them an
aggrassive
Correct your spelling
aggressive
 behaviour toward the nation teachings and culture ,
in addition
 , the more using fashioned clothes the more the gap between poor and rich increases,
for example
 when student attend school the poor
one
 wearing simple traditional
custome
Correct your spelling
customer
 while the rich
presentes
Correct your spelling
presented
 with
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
 different style every other day which
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
 the performance of the former
one
 badly . in conclusion, despite
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the
positve
Correct your spelling
positive
 impact of
followling
Correct your spelling
following
 fashions there are
also
 many drawbacks for better nations
Add a comma
,
show examples
there
most
Correct your spelling
must
show examples
 be a balance while using stylish clothes by limiting it to
soical
Correct your spelling
social
 and formal event and using it
interchangebly
Correct your spelling
interchangeably
 with
traditional
Add an article
the traditional
a traditional
show examples
one
Submitted by warwredan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: