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Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Teenagers in some nations work at jobs while they are still in school. Do you think it is a good idea for students to have jobs? Use specific examples and reasons to explain your answer.

#teenagers #nations #work #jobs #school #idea #students
Nowadays,
students
 start
work
 along with their
studies
. In some nations,
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 a common trend that teenagers
work
 from their early age.
Although
 it is beneficial for them to
work
 during their
studies
,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
there are some consequences of working with
studies
 related to health. Let us discuss both merits and demerits in the following paragraphs.
First
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foremost, working with
studies
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 good use of free
time
 for
students
.
Secondly
, it helps the
students
 to learn about their responsibility, punctuality,
value
Add an article
the value
show examples
 of the money and managing
time
.
In addition
 to it,
work
 during study reduces the money related burden from their family. Apart from that, during
job
Add an article
the job
a job
show examples
,
students
 gain more knowledge and experience as they interact
new
Change preposition
with new
show examples
 people at their workplace.
Also
, they feel independent and can plan their future
accordingly
. On the other side,
work
 with study has disadvantages too. The
students
 cannot have enough
time
 for their
studies
 and sometimes the
students
 leave their study for earning more money in their early age which affects on their future.
Moreover
, the pressure of handling both
studies
 and
work
 can lead
students
 to
meantal
Correct your spelling
mental
 as well as physical health
realted
Correct your spelling
related
 problems during their early age.
In addition
 to it, Working
students
 have less
time
 to participate in extra-
curriculm
Correct your spelling
curriculum
curricular
 and other activities
such
 as movies, parties with family and friends as these activities are
important
Add an article
an important
show examples
 part of their life. To Summarize, Working along with
studies
 will be beneficial for teenagers in their future but at the same
time
 its
also
 important for them to enjoy with family their family and friends.
Submitted by amandeepbenipal910 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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