Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sport. Do you agree or disagree?

Finacial
Correct your spelling
Financial
show examples
expensis
Correct your spelling
expenses
, either on
education
or
sports
are very detrimental in the policy and motive of any Government .
However
, I agree that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
Pen is
mighter
Correct your spelling
mightier
than the sword is the perfect and well known saying for the importance of an effective
education
system.
Nervertheless
Correct your spelling
Nevertheless
, at the same time
sports
and other
recretional
Correct your spelling
recreational
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
are
also
crusial
Correct your spelling
crucial
for the Holistic development of any Individual. With regards to emphasis on
Education
System, it has had
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
far reaching
Add a hyphen
far-reaching
show examples
impact on any individual or a society as a whole.
Firstly
,
Education
open
Change the verb form
opens
show examples
the gates of knowledge,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
has implications on day-
today
Correct your spelling
to day
show examples
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
and
therefore
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
of a Nation in terms of GDP.
For instance
, any poorly or
illetrate
Correct your spelling
illiterate
illustrate
society without proper input from governing body
interfence
Correct your spelling
interference
can not do any technical or
non technical
Add a hyphen
non-technical
show examples
innovation
there by
Correct your spelling
thereby
show examples
act as a
libilty
Correct your spelling
liability
rather than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
a asset
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
any Government.
Where as
Correct your spelling
Whereas
show examples
Recretional
Correct your spelling
Recreational
or
Sports
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
can
led
Change the verb form
lead
be led
show examples
to a
heathy
Correct your spelling
healthy
show examples
individual or society. Today ,
World
Correct article usage
the World
show examples
is
sufferning
Correct your spelling
suffering
from major lifestyle diseases like Diabetes,Depression,Asthma
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
result
Add an article
the result
a result
show examples
of lathargyness that are spread due to non-physical
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
or
continous
Correct your spelling
continuous
reading and writing or learning.
Moreover
, due to lack of funds provided, there are a huge
deficet
Correct your spelling
deficit
of
athelets
Correct your spelling
athletes
that have potential, but without resources are useless to win any championship or trophy. In a Nutshell, A healthy body keeps a
Healhy
Correct your spelling
Healthy
mind. Both,
Education
and
Sports
or Reacretinal
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
are important for the holistic progress of any
natin
Correct your spelling
nation
because without any financial input it will
ultimetly
Correct your spelling
ultimately
errodes
Correct your spelling
erodes
eroded
the country's pride and development.
Submitted by bhardwaj.rahul199 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: