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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Internet crime is increasing rapidly as more and more people are using the internet to make financial transactions. What can be done to tackle this problem

Nowadays, we can see the digital world has revolutionized
the
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society. Due to the rapid
growing
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growth
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 of people who made financial transactions via
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
the internet
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, the cybercrime is rising as well. In
this
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 essay, I will explore the problem associated with
this
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 and suggest some possible solutions.
To begin
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 with, the increasing number of online transaction leads to more opportunistic crime
which
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in which
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 hackers can easily gain unauthorized access to people’s computer system and obtain their financial and personal data for other dishonest and illegal activities.
For instance
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, the hackers may use those personal data to make fraud transaction online as well as holding the victim’s information for ransom. Many victims will need to pay
certain
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a certain
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 amount of money to the criminal for getting back the information been stolen. One solution to
this
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 could be everyone should purchase
an
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apply
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effective anti-virus software, using strong passwords for every website they are accessing.
Furthermore
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,
internet
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 users should always stay alert and do not open any suspicious email and website.
As a result
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, their personal data will be difficult to access by other parties without authorization.
In addition
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, it is noticeable that many
children
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 have been targeting and being manipulated by criminal online, there were some
children
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 in the past being asked to expose their body online, cybercriminal
then
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 captured
this
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 and resell it illegally.
Moreover
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, many
children
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 were harassed racially and sexually through accessing the
internet
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. The local government should work with education institution to educate
children
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 on how to use the digital platform properly and its dangers. Meanwhile, parental guidance is
also
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 essential, parents need to play an active role and monitor their
children
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’s online activities to prevent
the
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cybercrime. To conclude,
the
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cyberspace could have
it’s
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its
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 dangers, both the government and individuals should responsible and work together to avert any crime activities through
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
the internet
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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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