IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people believe that we should protect all wild animals while others believe we should just protect some of them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #animals
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It is argued by some that all wild
animals
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 should be given protection in order to make sure that not even a single animal will
disapear
Correct your spelling
disappear
.
However
Linking Words
, in my opinion, people should choose which
animals
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 to protect, due to the financial difficulty that may arise if we try saving every wild creature. On the one hand, some individuals think that we must protect every wild animal
,
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apply
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 because it is the only way in which we can be sure that no
specie
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species
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 will be left behind to
extinction
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. If we start to ponder which animal is worth saving
,
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apply
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 and spend more resources on certain
animals
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,
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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 might be lost forever.
For example
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, if mankind decides that it is too risky and expensive to save the snow
leapord
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leopard
leopards
, the chances of
this
Linking Words
 wild animal
to survive
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surviving
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 are scarce.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some argue that we should protect only a selected group of
animals
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 and
this
Linking Words
 way there will be a greater chance to save
animals
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 that are
in
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at
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 a significant risk for
extinction
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. Protecting wild
animals
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 is an expensive task. If we try to help every wild animal, regardless of the economic cost of these actions, we might lead to an adverse result, due to lack of funding that will surely arise.
For instance
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, spending an enormous amount of money in order to save one rare
specie
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species
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 of
monkeis
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monkeys
 in
africa
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Africa
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 could mean that many other
animals
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 there will face
extinction
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. in conclusion, I strongly believe that people should decide on a limited number of wild
animals
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 that are
in
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at
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 a major risk for
extinction
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 at the present time and invest their money and resources on saving them.
Submitted by nimrod.dar on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem
  • conservation status
  • ecological significance
  • holistic approach
  • endangered species
  • natural heritage
  • unforeseen negative impacts
  • economically non-viable
  • prioritization
  • ecosystem balance
  • conservation efforts
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