Some people think that schools are merely turning children into good citizens and workers, rather than benefiting them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is often argued that pupils are moulded by their teachers so as to make them become only respectful members of society, living aside the evaluation of each students’ individuality. In my opinion, I agree that
such
institutions are trying to raise children not in the right way as they are not treating them as a singular human being, but ,
instead
, they are viewing them only as future citizens. It is true that schools are the
second
places where infants are taught what is good and what is not. Many studies affirm that the
second
socialisation occurred within the schools’ classroom, and due to their little ,age they can learn better good manners.
Moreover
, at school they start to interact with their peers and understand what is the most suitable behaviour when they are with them, sometimes
this
is encouraged by the tutor. For
this
reason, many believe that children should be prepared for the real world by their schoolteacher and that they should learn how to become good citizens, in order to improve the behaviour of future generations.
On the other hand
,it is thought that not letting pupils express what they think can have negative impacts on their lives. It appears that among the teenagers there is a huge rebellion behaviour,and
this
needs to be respected as they want to express their feelings and communicate that there are changes.
Therefore
, the school should encourage them to express themselves because not allowing them to do so could have an impact on their life and sometimes affect their future relationship or even their job careers. In conclusion, after a deep ,examination I think that pupils need to be instructed by both parents and scholar on the community's rules and how to be good citizens,
this
said I
also
think that it is important to benefit the same children as individuals.
Submitted by dhanya.ercolano on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: