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Writing Samples
Band 5

The money spent on space research has brought enormous benefits to mankind. But it could be more usefully applied. How far do you agree?

#money #space #research #mankind
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It is true that humans have greatly benefited from funds used on
space
 research, even though other important alternatives ought to have been taken into consideration. I completely agree that
,
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 monies could have been strictly utilized on public
services
aside
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fromaside
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 the
space
 sciences. There are various reasons why investing in the work of astronauts need to be reconsidered.
Firstly
, pace launching is extremely expensive.
This
 involves the high costs associated with training scientists and other workers as well as the acquisition of necessary equipment. It can be argued that
,
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 humans are able to study the galaxy through
the
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space
 missions.
However
,
this
 is only applicable to people who reside in more
industralised
Correct your spelling
industrialised
 regions.
On the other hand
, the less privileged are most often not beneficiaries
to
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of
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 these discoveries, which I believe is not worth the budget on
such
 programs. I believe that funding
space
 missions should be directed towards public
services
instead
. It is much cheaper to build schools, hospitals than it is to spend on
space
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a space
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 launch. The public
services
 come at a greater opportunity for all inhabitants in a particular area. To cite an example, students can find themselves in well-built schools to
further
 their education.
Additionally
, people who fall sick can seek health care from the health care delivery to improve their health. If funds are shifted to these
services
, the vast majority will have a better quality of life. In conclusion, I consider that money needs to be allocated to
services
 in the society that benefit all individuals as it is misplaced to have attention on
importance
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the importance
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 of
space
 projects.
Submitted by Gurwinder Singh on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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