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Band 5

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #socialise #face #development
At
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In
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 the present world,
people
 tend to interact through the internet rather than having a face to face interactions. In my opinion,
this
 would bring
impact
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the impact
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 of seclusion, communication deception and
being
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be
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 self
centered
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centred
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. The
first
 problem
might
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that might
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 come from online interactions is that it could make
people
 tend to seclude.
People
 now can talk to anyone and anytime just from inside the room without having to spend some money to pay for the transportation cost or suffering traffic jams on the road just to be able to meet their friends.
This
 advantage makes
people
 more comfortable to enjoy being in the house alone,
that
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which
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 might lead them to some mental issues
such
 as depression or feeling stressed. The
second
 problem would be communication deception that
rise
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arise
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 in social life. Even though we can video chat with
people
 now, we can only look
some
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at some
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 part of the body or face of the
people
 we are talking to without being able to watch their body language on the whole.
This
 might benefit the criminals who can pretend to be
a
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apply
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good friend, while
in
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at
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 the same time they are actually are planning to do some criminal acts and
people
 sometimes can easily misjudge
people
because
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ofbecause
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 the limit of online communication. The
third
 problem is
people
 would tend to be
self centered
Add a hyphen
self-centered
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. Being able to
socializing
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socialize
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 through the internet, may make
people
 feel that they would not have to waste a lot of energy or time for their friends.
This
 sometimes could make them think that they do not have to respect other
people
 as much as when they meet with their friends in-person who must provide some time and efforts, just to go out of the house, get into the transportation means and
finally
 meet them. In fact, some
people
 might think that they could call anyone
when ever
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whenever
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 they want to without ever considering if
that
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those
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people
 have other urgent things to do in their life. Underestimating
people
’s life like
this
 would make
people
 only think about themselves. In conclusion,
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
 it has become more common now in terms of online socializing, it has become the source of some serious problems that might lead
into
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to
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 a negative change.
Submitted by Alexander on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social media platforms
  • online interactions
  • virtual communication
  • global community
  • interpersonal skills
  • digital divide
  • cyberspace
  • virtual presence
  • social networking
  • mental wellbeing
  • digital literacy
  • safe spaces
  • marginalized groups
  • face-to-face communication
  • socialisation
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